Going Mad...

I'm wondering about going mad,
and I'm actually thinking at this moment that it's a beautiful thing.

I'm in the clouds...(Flying home)
I'm in-between two quiet men.
One's reading "man fiction" and one's reading about emotional intelligence,
how to get the best of things.

I'm thinking about life and quietly weeping.
I'm thinking about going mad.

It's your minds way of coping with the difficulties life sends you...
It's trying to make sense of things that don't make sense.

I'm thinking about people, about family and babies and how lovely and precious they are
I'm thinking about gratefulness.

This is all happening amid the roar of the engines, the thick blanket of cloud
and the cold air from the overhead duct.

It's funny, jammed in here its a very public/private space,
and we're all literally "up in the air".

I'm thinking it's ok to be old, funny incapable, unable, disabled, dependant,
incomplete...mad.
It's ok, and somehow you're still you...

When you love someone you don't need them to be capable, you just want them to be there,
you want to remember...you want to have a lot to remember.

You don't always know that you love people so much.
It takes something to open your eyes...
Your heart's been open all along.

These are some thoughts that I penned on the flight home from visiting mum earlier in the year.
She was in hospital as a result of being in the last stages of Parkinson's and Alzheimer's.
The situation at times was surreal, and she seemed to literally be between two worlds.
Thinking of endings is sometimes frightening we want to avoid it rather than embrace it. 
It all made me think...about life, death, love, loss and going mad.
In the end I thought it was ok...not easy but ok.